A-typical
Another Monday with lots to do, up and at ‘em, everyone fed and the kids off to school. Get the computer on, look at the list of tasks for today you wrote on Friday.
Another non-stop running of minutes into hours – how is it 11:00 already? I need to get some more water to drink. And maybe a snack.
Argh – it’s 13:15 and too late to get out for a cycle at lunchtime before meetings kick in again.
And before you know it, it’s 15:10 and the kids return from school. Better think about that list for tomorrow and what you can close off before the attention turns to homework and dinner.
This is the current variation of life at home.
Looks like a lot of winging and bad planning when I write it down.
Is today just another vanishing act of life and breath?
I’ll be honest and say it’s been really frustrating at times – this rinse and repeat life that I’ve slipped in to. Perhaps you have too.
And all the more frustrating right now because I know in two weeks time I won’t be doing this anymore. The record will change and a new rhythm will be found.
Two weeks to go.
A few people have said “You’re leaving – it doesn’t matter?”. But that’s not true, is it? Each day does matter.
The tasks I’m doing – and getting a little frustrated by – could be done by someone else. But they’ve been given to me. And they will make an impact on the lives of those who remain in the team I leave behind.
And that’s the thing.
Why I am doing these things – caring about them – it’s because I’m doing it for them. Because it’s really important to finish well.
In cycling parlance, they talk about going “all the way to the line”. You don’t knock off your effort just because you can see the finishing line. You keep going – give it all.
Last week, I listened to “One Wild Life” for the first time in a few years. And this line has been rattling around my head ever since. “these are the days you’ve been given, what will you do with each of them?”
A Jewish Rabbi said “greater love has no-one than this; that they lay their life down for their friends”. He turned out to be on a mission to do just that; and not just for those around Him, but for all who would receive Him.
I have two weeks left at work, the next two weeks matter as much as the previous 1194. I’m no messiah, and the desire to finish well is not about status or glory – it’s about leaving it all out there. Letting the seed fall into the ground and letting it go.
These are the days you’ve been given – what, or who, are you giving them to?
Grace and peace,
Andy
Hi Andy, I will follow your journey if I may and engage too. There have been some major changes in my own lived out experiences. Reflection and unlock at the down tools time has pushed many of us to re consider purpose. How do we address ourselves if purpose has been relegated to existence? Purpose gives us selfworth. Remove it and selfworth slips into a need for self justification. If few are encouraged by personal change, what purpose have we? . End result during down time and relaxation disturbs a wasps nest of mental poison. You’re stung frequently when you least expect it. A vision , a revisit to some far off place of violation. A regret. Many regrets. Out of the mess comes the understanding of proverbs and ecclesiastes passages , in which the writers see the meaningless of life itself. A life without that Rabbi you mention is just that. Nonetheless it’s a tightrope walk. When balance ceases to be it could be fatal. But let’s not be fatalistic. What have we to fear, but fear itself ?
Take care mate, regards to all and stay safe.
P
Hi Paul, and thanks for the encouragement.
I am excited about the opportunities that lie ahead.
A key thing in the process to this point has been to stay aware of the current circumstances and honour all that’s been.
Rather than rushing ahead to the next, possibly shiny, thing.
Grace and peace,
Andy